"Be strong and bold; have no fear or dread of them, because it is the Lord your God who goes with you; he will not fail you or forsake you.”
For years, even decades, education leaders have silently shouldered the immense pressure they have at work. With ever-increasing demands for classroom resources, student behavioural problems and everyday crises, leaders are physically, mentally and emotionally exhausted. To manage their schools, some leaders may adopt the ‘all-knowing persona,’ fearing that otherwise they may be perceived as weak. What they may not realize is presenting an all-knowing persona is not effective leadership.
Common myths around vulnerability
According to Dr. Andrew Miki, Chief Science Officer and Clinical Psychologist at Starling Minds, society has a number of misconceptions about vulnerability:
- Vulnerability is a weakness: We’ve been conditioned to view vulnerability as a weakness, but it is a strength. Being vulnerable shows, we have the self-awareness and confidence to admit when we don’t know something and to therefore find people who know the answer.
- Vulnerability is a weapon against you: We may think people will take advantage of our vulnerability, but it can be an effective leadership tool, one which fosters understanding and compassion.
- Confident people are not vulnerable: Confident leaders are more willing to be vulnerable and admit when they don’t have the answer. They are confident in who they are, and they are willing to surrender control of a conversation and let the best idea win.
Benefits of vulnerability
Being vulnerable is a skill. It requires people to use their emotional intelligence to determine when to be vulnerable to build trust within relationships and gain support. Vulnerability:
- Builds trust and fosters a safe environment for others to share their own vulnerability. If a leader feels it is safe to share their struggles and experiences, it invites others to do the same.
- Enhances interpersonal trust among leaders and staff and thus improves learning outcomes. For example, when teachers feel safe asking for help and collaborating with others, they open opportunities to enhance their teaching and ultimately improve learning opportunities for students.
- Encourages leaders to reflect on their own vulnerability, which is a critical aspect of self-awareness. This allows leaders to develop the skill of being vulnerable with others effectively.
Within education, a drastic shift in thinking around vulnerability and leadership is needed. Educational leaders need to recognize that making mistakes is an inherent part of learning and effective leadership. It is also an effective tool to cultivate trust, openness, compassion and community among staff.
How to embrace your vulnerability
The U.S. National Association of Secondary School Principals describes six steps to becoming a more open, vulnerable leader for yourself and others:
- Recognize your own vulnerability: Acknowledge your own vulnerability as it will help you be more aware of your own feelings, thoughts and emotions. It will also help you build the tools and skills you need to embrace your imperfections and those of others.
- Take ownership of mistakes: It takes strength and courage to admit a mistake and take ownership of it. But this increases trust and credibility. If you are willing to acknowledge your mistakes as a leader and learn from them, others will be more willing to share and discuss difficulties and concerns. Problems are more likely to be resolved quickly and effectively.
- Share your own learning and challenges: Part of being a leader is to welcome continuous learning and empower others to do the same. Sharing your own learnings and challenges can help others realize that making mistakes is not something to fear, but rather an instrumental part of the learning process.
- Recognize, acknowledge and respect others: Acknowledge when others may be feeling more vulnerable and respect them for having the strength and courage to speak up. Encouraging openness means creating a workplace that is open, honest and good for growth.
- Ask for and receive help from others: Asking for help is one of the most important tools leaders can use. It shows a leader is willing to trust others and share their power. As leaders release power to others, it empowers others to step up and strengthen their leadership capabilities in the school. It allows you to share the responsibility of leadership, providing you the space to practise self-care and lower your levels of stress, anxiety and burnout.
- Instil confidence in yourself as a leader: It’s important to be open about your mistakes and ask for help, while building confidence in your staff as a competent leader. This includes taking control when situations arise and upholding your responsibility to keep others engaged at work and confident in their abilities. Somewhat a balancing act, it’s about building and promoting trust through your daily interactions with staff, students, parents and the larger school community.
Harnessing vulnerability can be a life changer for school leaders. But it can be difficult to navigate on your own. Research shows we tend to overestimate the risks of being vulnerable and underestimate the benefits it provides. By embracing vulnerability and giving yourself permission to be vulnerable to yourself and others, you can usher in a new and essential form of leadership that is much needed in our schools.